I Have My Limits: Write Yiddish, Cast British

Image courtesy of the World Series of Poker (Alicia Skillman)

First off, hats off to Benny Glaser, who took down the $50,000 Poker Players Championship, a nine-game mix that is harder than Chex mix left out overnight.  

The final table – and final chairs, Squid game was not in the mix, was a formidable lineup including Phil Ivey looking for his 12th bracelet, Jason Mercier, Paul Volpe, and the man Glaser ultimately faced heads up, Josh Arieh, trying to win his eighth bracelet and some redemption for not being among this year’s nominees to the Poker Hall of Fame.  

The players were close to even at the beginning of heads-up play, but when, during a hand of No Limit Hold’em, Arieh turned his pocket deuces into a bluff on a paired board, Glaser called him with QT, having paired his queen on the turn.  

A few hands later, during a round of PLO 8 or Better, Arieh was looking to get it all in with A♠7♠3♦4♠, and the feeling was mutual for Glaser, who held A♥Q♦7♦3♠.

The runout gave both players two pair, but Glaser’s were higher, and that’s all she wrote.

Speaking of writing, an old Hollywood maxim recommends to write Yiddish, cast British, and Glaser, being a Jewish Englishman, did just that as both the author and hero of this amazing story. Cheers to you, sir!

Hall Marks, “A” for Effort “C-“ for result   

As I mentioned above, Arieh, who took home a very soothing $895,837 for second, did not get on this year’s Poker Hall of Fame ballot. The nominating process, instituted in 2009, allows players, fans, and really anyone to vote online. It also means that potential nominees can campaign, as many did.

Oversights and mistakes can happen. In fact, in the very first year that this method was employed, 23-year-old Tom Dwan made it onto the ballot. Though deservedly popular for his exciting play on High Stakes Poker, Durrrr, as he’s known, was left standing out in the hall of the Hall when the living members took the actual vote.

After that, the powers that be instituted the minimum age of forty to avoid the latest sensation from entering the hallowed hall prematurely.  

This year saw eight players nominated: Scott Seiver, Mike Matusow, Chris Moorman, Issac Haxton, and Isai Sheinberg, along with first-timers Jason Koon, Shaun Deeb, and Justin Bonomo.

Bonomo is a first timer, but he’s also multi-accounter. For the unfamiliar, Bonomo cheated by playing on multiple accounts at the same time back when online poker was legal in the US.

Because of this and other issues, Bonomo’s presence on the nominee list hasn’t sparked bonhomie in the pokerverse, despite poker bona fides. 

He’s sixth on the all-time list with over $65 million in career earnings and has three WSOP bracelets, one of which was for The Big One for One Drop that paid $10 million. Add to that a string of victories on the PokerGo Tour, two Triton titles, a giant win in the Super High Roller Bowl, and another on PokerStars’ Caribbean Adventure, and you almost forget about his Palestinian adventure. Almost.

It was at the 2024 WSOP Paradise that the high-stakes crusher, high roller tournament phenom, and High Holy Days haranguer sparked controversy by wearing a Kufiyah, a scarf associated with the Palestinian movement and Hamas.

Many were outraged as this was only a year after Hamas staged the coordinated attacks that resulted in the murder of 1,200 innocent Israeli civilians and the taking of 251 hostages.

You could say that the Kufiyah represents the Palestinian people, rather than Hamas, and that these non-combatant residents of the Gaza Strip were victims worthy of sympathy and support, but this humanitarian analysis didn’t hold water for many when Bonomo’s wearing a Kafiyah was seen in the context of his statements on social media about Israel.    

Twitter and YouTube beefs surrounding this incident and Bonomo’s general attitude have been widely reported, and you can find them on your own, if you like, on X. I don’t want to amplify them or give them any more oxygen by re-presenting them to my reader.

For the record, I am Jewish, and I stand with Israel. I disagree with many things that Israel is doing currently, just as I disagree with many things the United States does at home and abroad, and though I may oppose the leadership of my country or that of my historic homeland, I wouldn’t turn my back on either.

You may not care about this, but I don’t want to wade into a controversy without my position being clear.

All that said, Bonomo’s poker accolades are Hall-worthy. His political convictions are extreme, but they are, to be intellectually honest, not without merit. They are not entirely right nor entirely wrong. In general, Bonomo is very annoying, but he is allowed to be so and, in my opinion, be in the Hall. It’s not the Nobel Peace Prize.

But let’s return to the Hall itself, which this year has changed the voting rules for induction. Previously, only one player was admitted per year, last year’s spontaneous coronation of Michael Mizrachi notwithstanding.

However, beginning this year, in order to ease the logjam of eligible players and innovators, all 33 living members of the Poker H of F will get four votes to cast on the nominees.

If any nominated person receives 22 votes, they will be inducted into the Hall.  With 132 votes, that means that theoretically, six rounders could roll into the Hall. That seems like a lot.

Fortunately, I have a suggestion that might fix all these problems. Let’s take the model from the Baseball Hall of Fame, where induction is not voted on by players or fans or even those already enshrined.

The inductees are selected by the Baseball Writers Association of America. So I say, Poker Writers of the World unite! I’m talking to you full-time scribes like Craig Tapscott and Brad Willis; and player/writers like David Lappin, Dara O’Kearney, Maria Konikova, and Jen Shahade. I’m talking to you, Paul Seaton, Dave Woods, Chad Campbell, et al. And, of course, me. Okay, just a thought.  

My Main Event – the $1,000 Seniors No Limit Hold’Em

Day 1A of the $1,000 Seniors didn’t feel that different from most events at the World Series of Poker, in that most people were younger than me.  

With a starting stack of 20,000 and 60-minute levels, you begin with 200 big blinds. Not a ton of chips by today’s standards, but I guess, like the swimming pool at a Senior Center, they don’t want it too deep.  

Okay, enough with the old jokes. The truth is, there were tons of great players in the tournament. The age requirement is only 50, middle-aged by most measurements. Maybe they should change the Seniors to 55 and up, like the Villages in Florida, and then add an event just for players having a midlife crisis. To play, you have to be 45 or older and dating someone 25 or younger. The play would be game theory optional, and the rail would be made for TV.    

Maybe there needs to be other specialty tournaments.

There’s a Ladies event, why not have a Ladyboy event, where only trans women can play?  

Or a Laddies event where only men play. Never mind, that’s every tournament.  

Anyhow, seated at my table for all of day one was someone who I thought looked like David ODB Baker. I was in seat 3, and he was in seat 8, and I had previously only seen photos of him, but thanks to the improved WSOP Live app, I could look on my phone and see that it was, in fact, David Baker. Cool. About ODB, but also the app is pretty amazing. You can read up on all the players at your table.  

A few weeks back, I had written how if you only had 500 to spend on poker this summer, you could do a lot worse than participate in the ODB Fantasy Draft. Maybe on a break, I could snag an interview and get some insight into how the season has developed. It was not to be.

I was playing my usual snug game, and my stack was hanging around the 30K neighborhood with blinds of 1,000/1,000/500. I hadn’t seen any cards or a cocktail waitress for hours when this hand occurred.

Seat 8, ODB in the hijack, had min raised to 2,000. It folded to me in the big blind, and I looked down at A♦10♦. I called, and we went to a flop, which was J T 4 rainbow.

I checked, and ODB put out a bet that I took to be 3,200. With the second pair top kicker I wasn’t going anywhere. I considered raising, but I just called, putting out 3200. I was quickly corrected by my opponent and another player that it was 4,200. I reluctantly flipped in another 1,000 off my stack of about 25,000. This made me a little anxious. My stack was now about 2x pot, and I could see it going in by the river.  

The turn was a beautiful ten of spades, giving me trip tens with the very best kicker, but also putting two spades on the board. I checked, hoping he would bet. He checked back. Which was a great move.

To call on the flop means I probably hit the board in some way, but I may well have raised if I paired the jack. There was a better-than-average chance that I had a ten, and if that was the case, ODB didn’t want to do my betting for me.

The last card was forgettable because it completed none of the draws. Without much hesitation, I bet 6,000.  

ODB took a minute and chucked in the call. I turned over my hand, and he folded without showing. I was feeling pretty good. I had played exactly one hand vs. ODB, and it arrived C.O.D.  

Then the player who had policed my call on the flop asked me, “Would you have called the flop if you thought the bet was 4,200 instead of 3,200?”

Baker said, he’s calling all day. He’s calling 14,200.  

I wasn’t sure if that was him just mad that he took a bad beat. I thought he had at least a jack or maybe a big pair. Or he was saying I was a chump, and that’s why I called way behind. Or was he just explaining that anyone would call with a second pair ace kicker? I was very curious about what he had.

At the next break, he didn’t look like he wanted to talk. I approached him anyway, but as I got closer, he pretended to be on the phone.  I thought, “He should be nice to me. He might need my vote to get into the Hall of Fame.”

And In the End

I made it to Day 2A of the Seniors. I was pretty happy. I had 53,000 in chips. That was exactly 26 and a half big blinds. We returned with 795 players, and the money bubble was 531.

With 45 players left until the money, and the big blind at 3000, I had 85.5K, approximately 28 bigs. I looked for some spots and found a few. A good call, some good folds, and a run of cards.

My stack was at 139K as my rush continued.  A short stack shoved into me. I had queens, and they had jacks. 187K!  We made the money and went on a dinner break shortly thereafter.  

After dinner, I managed to get paid on three streets with pocket aces and was up to nearly 300K. Then things really went off the rails.

Card dead for at least one level. I tried to make a move and got cut off at the knees by a big stack. Down to 176K, with blind at 8K/8K/4K, our table was broken, and I was sent to a new table where a well-known and colorful player named Turbo was running over opponents while getting a massage.

There were several huge stacks at the table, and I was not playing many hands to say the least. As my stack dwindled below twenty big blinds, I looked for a place to get it in, but there was so much raising and three betting pre flop it was a challenge.

Finally, it was folded to me on the button. I had about 9 big blinds left and pushed all in with 5♦6♦. The small blind snap called me with AQ.  The baby flop offered me some hope with a gutshot, and the turn added a flush draw. In the end, I was out in 181st place. It paid $2690.  

Then this happened: